Bible in a Year - Women’s Thematic Reading Plan | Day 185

Day 185 of the Women’s Bible Plan: Read 1 Samuel Chapter 20 and reflect on the painful tension between Saul and Jonathan. Through Saul’s jealousy, fear, anger, and desire for control, this devotional helps us consider how power and envy can wound parent-child relationships, and how God calls us to hold fast to truth, love, and reverence for Him within family conflict.

🌸  Dear Sister, welcome to Day 185 of our reading journey. 

Family is meant to be a place of love, protection, and belonging. Yet sometimes the deepest tension and pain can also happen within the family. Parental expectations, a child’s choices, the desire to control, emotional outbursts, unspoken fear, and wounded pride can all make parent-child relationships strained and heavy.

1 Samuel Chapter 20 gives us a painful family picture. Saul is the king, and he is also Jonathan’s father. Jonathan is the prince, yet he deeply loves David and has made a covenant with him before the Lord. Saul, however, is consumed by jealousy toward David and fear of losing the throne. His anger and desire for control grow so strong that he turns that anger against his own son.

This chapter is not only about David fleeing from Saul. It also shows us what happens when a person values power more than truth and builds his sense of security on controlling others. When jealousy enters the family, love and trust between parent and child can be replaced by suspicion, accusation, shame, and hurt.

A Minute of Grace

1 Samuel Chapter 20 continues the crisis of David being hunted by Saul. David comes to Jonathan and speaks honestly about the danger he is facing. At first, Jonathan does not want to believe that his father Saul truly intends to kill David, but he is still willing to make a covenant with David and seek the truth about Saul’s heart.

In this chapter, Jonathan stands between his father Saul and his friend David. He loves his father and respects Saul’s position as king. Yet he also knows that David has done no wrong, and he sees that God is with David. Jonathan does not use family loyalty as an excuse to cover his father’s sin, nor does he betray his covenant with David because of pressure. He chooses to stand with truth and uses wisdom to protect David.

Saul’s response reveals the deeper problem in his heart. He is not only angry with David. Because David threatens his throne and his sense of security, Saul directs his rage toward Jonathan. He scolds and shames his own son, wrapping his jealousy and control in the language of “thinking about Jonathan’s future.” But what Saul truly cares about is not whether Jonathan is walking rightly before God; it is whether his own power can be preserved.

This is how power and jealousy damage family relationships. When parents treat children as tools for continuing their own plans rather than as lives entrusted to them by God, harm follows. When parents cannot accept that their children may choose truth over family pressure, and only demand that the child “take my side,” love begins to turn into control.

Jonathan’s life shows us another way. He does not respond to his father’s anger with reckless rebellion, and he does not remain silent in order to excuse wrongdoing. In the middle of tension, he stays spiritually clear. Under emotional pressure, he holds fast to righteousness. In danger, he remains faithful to what pleases God. His tears and farewell to David also show that standing for truth within broken family tension is not easy, but it is necessary.

Today’s theme, “Saul and Jonathan: Tension Between Father and Son,” invites us to reflect: Have we been wounded by power, jealousy, control, or fear in family relationships? And have we ever, without realizing it, placed our own insecurity onto our children, spouse, parents, or family members? God calls families not to control one another, but to grow together in truth and love.

Whispers for the Heart

1 Saul brought jealousy and anger into his relationship with Jonathan because he feared losing the throne. Have you ever seen or experienced similar family tension—parental control, comparison, emotional outbursts, or children growing silent and distant under pressure? How does this passage help you see how unhealed fear and jealousy can wound those closest to us?

2 Jonathan loved his father, but he did not blindly support his father’s wrong decision. He honored family relationship, but he feared God more. Have you ever struggled between family loyalty and truth? Is God inviting you to learn how to stand for what is right with both gentleness and firmness?

3 Saul cared more about his throne and future than about his son’s conscience before God. As parents, elders, ministry leaders, or spiritual companions, do we sometimes place our own expectations on others? How can we learn to entrust our children and family members to God instead of trying to keep them through control?

As you read 1 Samuel Chapter 20 today, do not only notice Saul’s pursuit of David. Also pay attention to the deep father-son tension between Saul and Jonathan. May this chapter help us discern that love is not control, authority is not oppression, and family affection must never replace obedience to God’s truth.

Take a quiet breath before you begin. Bring your family tensions, wounds, fears, desire for control, communication struggles, and hope for healing before the Lord, and let His Word meet you there.

🎞️ Today's Youtube Video 

🪕 Response Hymn: 

1 Samuel Chapter 20 (KJV)

20 And David fled from Naioth in Ramah, and came and said before Jonathan, What have I done? what is mine iniquity? and what is my sin before thy father, that he seeketh my life?

2 And he said unto him, God forbid; thou shalt not die: behold, my father will do nothing either great or small, but that he will shew it me: and why should my father hide this thing from me? it is not so.

3 And David sware moreover, and said, Thy father certainly knoweth that I have found grace in thine eyes; and he saith, Let not Jonathan know this, lest he be grieved: but truly as the Lord liveth, and as thy soul liveth, there is but a step between me and death.

4 Then said Jonathan unto David, Whatsoever thy soul desireth, I will even do it for thee.

5 And David said unto Jonathan, Behold, to morrow is the new moon, and I should not fail to sit with the king at meat: but let me go, that I may hide myself in the field unto the third day at even.

6 If thy father at all miss me, then say, David earnestly asked leave of me that he might run to Bethlehem his city: for there is a yearly sacrifice there for all the family.

7 If he say thus, It is well; thy servant shall have peace: but if he be very wroth, then be sure that evil is determined by him.

8 Therefore thou shalt deal kindly with thy servant; for thou hast brought thy servant into a covenant of the Lord with thee: notwithstanding, if there be in me iniquity, slay me thyself; for why shouldest thou bring me to thy father?

9 And Jonathan said, Far be it from thee: for if I knew certainly that evil were determined by my father to come upon thee, then would not I tell it thee?

10 Then said David to Jonathan, Who shall tell me? or what if thy father answer thee roughly?

11 And Jonathan said unto David, Come, and let us go out into the field. And they went out both of them into the field.

12 And Jonathan said unto David, O Lord God of Israel, when I have sounded my father about to morrow any time, or the third day, and, behold, if there be good toward David, and I then send not unto thee, and shew it thee;

13 The Lord do so and much more to Jonathan: but if it please my father to do thee evil, then I will shew it thee, and send thee away, that thou mayest go in peace: and the Lord be with thee, as he hath been with my father.

14 And thou shalt not only while yet I live shew me the kindness of the Lord, that I die not:

15 But also thou shalt not cut off thy kindness from my house for ever: no, not when the Lord hath cut off the enemies of David every one from the face of the earth.

16 So Jonathan made a covenant with the house of David, saying, Let the Lord even require it at the hand of David's enemies.

17 And Jonathan caused David to swear again, because he loved him: for he loved him as he loved his own soul.

18 Then Jonathan said to David, To morrow is the new moon: and thou shalt be missed, because thy seat will be empty.

19 And when thou hast stayed three days, then thou shalt go down quickly, and come to the place where thou didst hide thyself when the business was in hand, and shalt remain by the stone Ezel.

20 And I will shoot three arrows on the side thereof, as though I shot at a mark.

21 And, behold, I will send a lad, saying, Go, find out the arrows. If I expressly say unto the lad, Behold, the arrows are on this side of thee, take them; then come thou: for there is peace to thee, and no hurt; as the Lord liveth.

22 But if I say thus unto the young man, Behold, the arrows are beyond thee; go thy way: for the Lord hath sent thee away.

23 And as touching the matter which thou and I have spoken of, behold, the Lord be between thee and me for ever.

24 So David hid himself in the field: and when the new moon was come, the king sat him down to eat meat.

25 And the king sat upon his seat, as at other times, even upon a seat by the wall: and Jonathan arose, and Abner sat by Saul's side, and David's place was empty.

26 Nevertheless Saul spake not any thing that day: for he thought, Something hath befallen him, he is not clean; surely he is not clean.

27 And it came to pass on the morrow, which was the second day of the month, that David's place was empty: and Saul said unto Jonathan his son, Wherefore cometh not the son of Jesse to meat, neither yesterday, nor to day?

28 And Jonathan answered Saul, David earnestly asked leave of me to go to Bethlehem:

29 And he said, Let me go, I pray thee; for our family hath a sacrifice in the city; and my brother, he hath commanded me to be there: and now, if I have found favour in thine eyes, let me get away, I pray thee, and see my brethren. Therefore he cometh not unto the king's table.

30 Then Saul's anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said unto him, Thou son of the perverse rebellious woman, do not I know that thou hast chosen the son of Jesse to thine own confusion, and unto the confusion of thy mother's nakedness?

31 For as long as the son of Jesse liveth upon the ground, thou shalt not be established, nor thy kingdom. Wherefore now send and fetch him unto me, for he shall surely die.

32 And Jonathan answered Saul his father, and said unto him, Wherefore shall he be slain? what hath he done?

33 And Saul cast a javelin at him to smite him: whereby Jonathan knew that it was determined of his father to slay David.

34 So Jonathan arose from the table in fierce anger, and did eat no meat the second day of the month: for he was grieved for David, because his father had done him shame.

35 And it came to pass in the morning, that Jonathan went out into the field at the time appointed with David, and a little lad with him.

36 And he said unto his lad, Run, find out now the arrows which I shoot. And as the lad ran, he shot an arrow beyond him.

37 And when the lad was come to the place of the arrow which Jonathan had shot, Jonathan cried after the lad, and said, Is not the arrow beyond thee?

38 And Jonathan cried after the lad, Make speed, haste, stay not. And Jonathan's lad gathered up the arrows, and came to his master.

39 But the lad knew not any thing: only Jonathan and David knew the matter.

40 And Jonathan gave his artillery unto his lad, and said unto him, Go, carry them to the city.

41 And as soon as the lad was gone, David arose out of a place toward the south, and fell on his face to the ground, and bowed himself three times: and they kissed one another, and wept one with another, until David exceeded.

42 And Jonathan said to David, Go in peace, forasmuch as we have sworn both of us in the name of the Lord, saying, The Lord be between me and thee, and between my seed and thy seed for ever. And he arose and departed: and Jonathan went into the city.

🪕 Response Hymn: 

💡 Closing Thought · Love Is Not Control, and Family Needs Truth

After reading 1 Samuel Chapter 20, we see the painful father-son tension between Saul and Jonathan. Saul, afraid of losing power, became ruled by jealousy and anger, even wounding his own son. Jonathan, caught between his father’s pressure, his friend’s danger, and God’s truth, chose to fear the Lord, protect the innocent, and keep his covenant.

As we close this page and return to our own families and relationships, perhaps we have been wounded by control. Perhaps we have also, without realizing it, placed our own expectations heavily on others. Today’s Scripture reminds us that family affection is precious, but it cannot replace truth; authority carries responsibility, but it must not become oppression; love needs expression, but it also needs boundaries, respect, and reverence for God.

May God help us not to avoid, manipulate, or wound others with anger in family tension. May we learn to love in truth, repent in love, and entrust our relationships to Him. May our homes no longer be ruled by jealousy, fear, and control, but increasingly filled with God’s grace, honesty, and healing.

🎉🎉 Congratulations on completing today's devotion! 🎉🎉